When I was a practicing homeopath, I was always looking for another tool to add to the healing toolbox for my clients. When I found coaching, I discovered that there are so many similarities between coaching and natural medicine. As a Homeopath I was always thinking about how to facilitate healing in the body, and now as a coach I think about tools to facilitate healing the mind. They both have external symptoms, and they both have root causes that need to be addressed for true healing.
For example, most people take some type of painkiller to relieve symptoms like pain, or inflammation, or stiffness. But we all know, that painkillers help only for a short while. After a few days or weeks, the symptoms return because the root cause was never addressed. Only the symptom itself was addressed. Moreover, modern medicine does not train doctors to address root causes. This is one of the reasons I fell in love with natural medicine, because it always addressed the root cause. In the case of pain, the root cause can be found in how the person was living, what their diet was like, what deficiencies they had etc. Through the appropriate labs, a diet and lifestyle journal, and a discussion on optimal movement, a practitioner would create a thorough plan to help resolve the issue, not just the symptoms.
In coaching, the symptoms show up as negative feelings. As humans we have been trained to push our feelings down. Instead of feeling our feelings, we shop, overeat, and become workaholics. All of these things are how we buffer ourselves from feeling our true feelings. Often when feelings come up, instead of treating the root cause, which is our thoughts and beliefs, we take an action to feel better. For example, on a day you’re not feeling confident, most of us compensate for it by dressing really well, wearing nice shoes, or wearing extra makeup. Because we think fixing our external appearance gives us the confidence we want, we take all sorts of actions to feel better. But as you know, confidence comes from our thoughts, not our actions or our appearance, and therefore the root cause (thoughts) go unaddressed.
When clients hire me to launch their coaching practice, they often have trouble becoming more visible. Many of them like to push through the discomfort, almost by force or sheer will. They publish fabulous videos, but the internal feeling of self-doubt, shame or insecurity remains. This looks like progress on the outside, but the feelings remain, because they haven’t addressed the root cause: their thoughts about who they are in the world, their relationship with themselves, how much value they place in what people have to say about them.
Ultimately, it’s not enough to put on fancy clothes when you don’t feel confident, it’s not enough to force yourself to do things when you feel like shit internally, and it’s not enough to power through your feelings. You have to learn to sit with your feelings. You have to look at the limiting beliefs. And until you do that you will be battling the same feelings over and over again. And creating the same old results.
When I teach clients how to process their feelings, helping them feel better isn’t actually my goal. Healing is the goal. Unlearning is the goal. Dropping the stories and allowing themselves to be who they really are is the goal. When we heal the internal beliefs that keep us stuck, success and results show up as a side of effect of the healing.
If you’re a coach who wants to feel more confident and heal their brain from all the old conditioning that prevents you from being visible, from feeling confident, from being in love with who you really are, I invite you to a free consultation with me. Here we will go over what’s actually keeping you stuck, and I will give you the exact process to help you get unstuck. Click here to a book a call.
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